I Wish I had Never

by gillis

Today I am stealing inspiration for this post from a fellow slicer (he is in Australia-now I can’t find his posts-so terribly sorry for not using his blog name at least!) who wrote last week about the things he had never done. He was, in turn, inspired by the Graham Norton show where the question of things not done is apparently a feature of the show. I’m in a snarky mood today, so I thought I’d turn it towards wishful thinking colored by regret and shame, which I do well. Unfortunately, the syntax is a bit unwieldy…

I wish I had never stopped running.

I wish I had never forgotten my wedding anniversary.

I wish I had never worried about what others might think of me.

I wish I had never gotten that first credit card.

I wish I had never ignored the cat until she began vomiting up large quantities of internal organs.

I wish I had never gone a year without taking a family vacation.

I wish I had never self-medicated with refined carbohydrates.

I wish I had never heard of Rush Limbaugh.

I wish I had never taken the easy way out.

I wish I had never gone a day without reading something of my choice.

I wish I had never stopped skating, riding my bike, or playing dodgeball.

I wish I had never started drinking coffee, tea, lattes, chai, or any combination thereof.

I wish I had never gone too far with my words.

I wish I had never left the city.

I wish I had never lost touch with my college roommate.

I wish I had never spoken in anger.

I wish I had never eaten at Friendlys or Dunkin’ Donuts.

I wish I had never found myself too busy to be present with my husband or children.

I wish I had never let appointments slip.

I wish I had never ignored my mother’s advice and shaved my legs that first time.

I wish I had never thought about how it would feel to live alone.

I wish I had never stopped singing in front of people.

I wish I had never known what it was like to lose before you begin.

I wish I had never cut off another driver.

I wish I had never made promises I did not keep, especially to children.

 I wish I had never cut, permed, or colored my own hair.

I wish I had never allowed fear to stop me from trying something difficult.

I wish I had never worn a thong.

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